in the process of evolving into elderhood we inevitably come up against painful memories. many of these remembrances bring the pain of regret, the pain of knowing we have caused harm to others, or to ourselves. as we deepen our consciousness we might struggle to find a way to forgive ourselves in order to be free of the weight of guilt. 
can we reframe those events? can we begin to look at the situations which we regret as those that forge us into the complete humans we aspire to be? are they not the spur to growth?this reckoning is not a mere gloss, a covering over of what we have done and the sadness we feel about our actions. our heartfelt desire to have “done it differently” is the mark of a shift in consciousness. it is a mark of humility that ennobles our growth. the very fact that the memory awakens some pain demonstrates that we have learned from the experience. in our current state of awareness we would act differently.it is also the beginning of what, in the jewish tradition, is called t’shuvah. this word literally means “turning”. it is a change in direction, a new path, a return to wholeness. in most faiths there is a way of turning to a connection with the divine.
in our contemporary world we can use both traditional and newer forms of return. we can daily re-orient ourselves before sleep and take account of the day’s events. each week we can look deeply at our behaviour toward ourselves and others. monthly, in time with the new moon when the sky is darkest, we can shine a light into the soul and see a larger picture where patterns emerge.and finally, an annual reckoning allows the eye of the eagle to come into play. in the jewish tradition this takes place on yom kippur, the day of atonement (at-one-ment). this is the moment of the deepest self-forgiveness. we are then free to ask forgiveness of those we have injured and to offer forgiveness to those who might have caused us pain.in such ways we return to our sacred centre…connected and whole.