(Did you , by any chance, remember the rest of that line?)remembering the iconic movie, the graduate, do we also remember that the supposedly 45-50 year old mrs robinson was portrayed by a 35-year old ann bancroft?
there has been a flurry of articles in the newspaper about ‘more sex for the over-sixties”. while it’s true we are seeing more older women and men in films and television, we are still often portrayed in stereotypical roles...the frumpy granny, the outrageously successful business tycoon (always a man), the nagging mother-in-law or exhausted cleaner (could be either gender). when older women are portrayed as sexual beings, it is usually as the ‘cougar’, an older woman engaged in a sexual relationship with a younger man.in an article in the guardian (11 march 2020) kasia delgado tells us that, according to a UK film council survey, 60 per cent of older female film-goers “were tired of seeing themselves portrayed on the screen as “sexless grandmothers”.at the same time, an Age UK-funded study showed that more than half of men and almost a third of women over the age of 70 were sexually active.in film the issue of sex between older people is often solved by making sure no older flesh is shown on screen. while the sexual relationship is clear in the script, the physical manifestation of the script is not. it seems that most depictions of older peoples’ sexuality is either as comical or dangerous.like so many other aspects of older peoples’ lives, our sexuality is hidden, sidelined and deemed non-existent. and yet, our sexual energy is as important an aspect of who we are as our mental, emotional, physical and spiritual energies. pleasure in ourselves or in sharing with another is a vital part of staying vital and engaged. it doesn’t die at 60.
desire and pleasure are intrinsic to the human condition (and our physiology). for many olders, sexual exploration and expression is a path to deeper spiritual understanding...surrender, openness, vulnerability. sexual intimacy can open door to more profound spiritual intimacy. and to fun!as elders, holding the doors open to this intimate connection allows for surprise, the unexpected. this is usually seen a hallmark of childhood, the discovery the world.why not continue to discover as we grow older?