how to open to the spacious compassion that is forgiveness? we might begin simply by breathing, finding where it lives in us. this practice might take us to the spacious sea.
Begin by making yourself comfortable. Become aware of your breath. In this quiet internal space, create an environment that is safe and comforting. Invite, in your imagination, the person you wish to forgive into your safe space. This person could be yourself. Hold this person in your mind’s eye and in your heart. Allow your breath to flow out and in again.
Step 1: Physical Level—Breathe!What is it that you need to forgive? Hold the memory of this incident clearly. Where do you feel it in your body? What physical sensations arise? Is there tingling, buzzing, aching, pain? There may be a few places in your body that respond to this question. Simply be with your body as you consider what needs forgiveness.
Step 2: Emotional Level—Breathe!In your imagination, tell the one being forgiven all of the pain you have suffered as a result of this incident. Ask that person to tell you his/her pain resulting from it.Now allow yourself to go back and forth between you and the other. Have a conversation about both of your feelings.Take a moment to picture the other as the young, innocent child that he/she once was. Notice what you are feeling as you see this image.
Step 3: Mental Level—Breathe!Consider how you would have preferred it to have been (positive), but did not experience. As you breath, let go of these thoughts so that you can focus on the truth of the experience. Holding on to the “ideal” you wish for might stand in the way of forgiveness. Letting go allows more freedom and spaciousness.
Step 4: Spiritual Level—Breathe!Extend open hands out to the imaginal one being forgiven. See yourself standing in front of this person and say in your mind’s voice: “I completely release you from all grudges of the past. We are both free now to have a more sustainable, happier relationship.”Breathe!And now, still seeing yourself standing in front of this person say in your mind’s voice, “I take responsibility for my actions, attitudes and behaviours.”
Step 5: Breathe!Move your consciousness to your higher self, or whatever word you use for your inner support. Open yourself to receive love from this all embracing, all accepting part of you. Allow this love flow into every part of you to heal all hurt and pain. Slowly let it fill the void left by letting go.
Step 6: Breathe!When you feel ready, in your minds eye and heart, extend your hands outward and say: “With the help of my higher self, I send love out to you and your higher self just the way you have been and the way you are now.”
Step 7: Breathe!Now, with a bit more internal space available, name what is good in the one to whom you have just extended forgiveness, and what is good in yourself.Take a moment now to notice how you feel in body, mind, emotions and spirit. Then slowly, as you are ready, open your eyes and come back into the room. You might want to make some notes in your journal to consider later.